Culture

Seeing undelighted all delight

September 11, 2008
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Every silver lining has a cloud so as you celebrate England's totally unexpected triumph over Croatia spare a thought for ten who saw undelighted all delight in Zagreb last night:

1. Michael Owen

Michael, who? Yes, already commentators and pundits have forgotten that hat-trick against Germany seven years ago and all those goals against top opposition, from Brazil to Argentina. Any more injuries and that could be it for Michael Owen's international career. Could his season get worse? First, Newcastle try to offload him, then the manager who wanted to keep him goes and now he's back in the queue for strikers because of one match.

2. 'Stevie' Gerrard

Forget all the flim-flam about who will be captain and about whether Capello will play Beckham. The hardest question facing Capello is can Lampard and Gerrard play together? All the signs are they can't and now Barry and Lampard (with Hargreaves and Carrick still to return from injury) have put together a very good-looking partnership.

3. Steve McLaren

He had bad luck with injuries and incompetent goalkeepers against Croatia, but just when he'd hoped Capello might have blown it, here comes an easy victory which makes McLaren look even worse.

4. The hacks

Just yesterday, Britain's best football writer (Martin Samuel in The Times) was saying this was make or break time for Capello. After Andorra and the Czech Republic, this was brewing up nicely for a perfect storm for the England manager, and the hacks love a fired manager. King Kev, Curbishley and now Capello. The perfect hat-trick. But it won't happen this side of Christmas.

5. Bilic

West Ham not returning your calls? Newcastle putting away their chequebook? What's it like to see those seven-figure offers recede over the horizon? Will they ever come back? One defeat at Wembley and Bilic won't see a decent job offer this side of 2010.

6. Sam Allardyce and Stuart Pearce

Remember those happy times when everyone wanted an Anglish manager to manage England? Don't hear much from them now do we?

7. Sky

England's best win in seven years and who has the rights? Yup.

8. The Guardian

Those clever boys and girls at The Guardian who spent the 2006 World Cup making fun of Theo Walcott

9. David Cameron

Of course, he's terribly patriotic and all that but who wants a feelgood moment to sweep the nation? Who could do with England flopping and not making it to South Africa in 2010, which just happenes to be election summer? Just wondering.

10. Capello

The last time an England manager had such a triumph was seven years ago when Sven's team beat Germany 5-1 in Germany. And what happened in 2006?