How to win the US presidency
by Teddy Wayne / October 17, 2012 / Leave a commentPublished in November 2012 issue of Prospect Magazine
Play “Oval Office Contender”—the ultimate party game! Here are the easy-to-follow rules and regulations (for complete instructions, please consult the 229-page Federal Election Campaign Laws guide):
Objective: Reach the Oval Office before anyone else.
Players: For two or more political players, ages 35 and up (natural-born Americans only), with minimum net worth of several million dollars.
Contents: Oval game board, die, game pieces: soldier’s helmet (“War Hero”); thick government budget (“Experienced Wonk”); Hollywood star (“Charismatic Actor”); American football (“Sports Icon”); helmeted hair (“Handsome Guy”); rising sun (“Audacious Optimist”); sensible trouser suit (“Female Candidate”); silver spoon (“Self-Made Titan of Industry”). Two decks of cards: green “War Che$t” and red “Political Wildcard”
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